I remember I started reading psychology books because they gave me peace and because I was able to understand myself better through all those concepts, slowly I started reading fiction although it did not make much sense reading something unreal, however it did pop to me that it was an escape and there were a lot of insights into the fiction that I chose to read. I do not believe that there has been a book up until this present day and I do not intend on having this experience of not enjoying a work of fiction because I curate my reading list and it is probably why I read a few books but I select the very best that I believe will be a wonderful reading.
I have not yet mastered the reading of the one book that maybe we should all read – the bible, but it is on my to be read list.
Why I read? Well. The truth is that I do not have a simple “I know why I read” response. It does make me feel better about myself, as I learn new things, but it also opens up possibilities I did not think of. I have discovered things and dreamt of options that I did not believe I could or was allowed to think of or that it would represent an option for me. It opened up my world as I tend to limit myself a lot in terms of how and what I can do. Because I am a perfectionist and when you struggle with this, you limit yourself because you believe you are not good enough to follow a path that may be opposite to what you expect it should look like. So, reading is giving me the power to overcome that byassed mindframe and see the world, see a sea of possibilities and see myself. I can see I can be free and I understand better that my creativity or my high expectations of being creative and putting out there something of exquisite value should not stop me from still sharing or letting myself being seen in the process of becoming that which I aspire. Reading gives me freedom, it makes me realize I have the freedom that I dream of but I cannot see it because of this “I must be perfect before I am allowed to receive that or experience this thing or share this” vibe.
When I read, I can open the cage, and fly like a bird. I dare to leave the cage, as books are magic, they are the key to my cage. And maybe you can say that I see myself in a cage and I am not, and maybe that is the case, but my perfectionism disease won’t allow me to erase that from my mind. I mean, that’s been built in 31 years. How can it collapse all of a sudden?
That’s why I read. To make myself free. To leave behind this imagined struggle of what I was grown up to think it is acceptable and it is how things are in the world.
I read to escape not from the real world, but from the imagined world society, school and other “institutions” have bombarded me to think of it. When in fact, the world is us. And we are free and perfect as we are. So I strive to achieve that belief strongly in my soul and mind and books and reading offer therapy for me, they give me serenity, bliss and it also gives me the power to truly see the world, the world as being me. And I am free.
Just as you are, just as the book you read is, just as the sun and the moon, and the stars, that together have welcomed us on Earth, so we can learn to become free and one with the world. Books give me that truth, as reading is opening the window for fresh air, for freedom, for life. And that’s also why the divine (and all spiritual things as well) is high on my priorities, and why The Bible, the One book that changed Life and the world should be on my #tbrlist.
Why do you read?